Sunday, May 9, 2010

Mother's Day

Happy Mother's Day! I hope everyone is having a wonderful day surrounded by family. Hugh is working today, so it was just the children and I. Hugh brought me roses last night after he got off of work, and he and the children awoke me this morning with hugs and kisses and cake. Yes cake, and very yummy cake I might add. I had a piece with a cup of tea earlier.

As, I was getting ready for church I received four voice messages and text from my wonderful friends and family wishing me a Happy Mother's Day. I have the most thoughtful family and friends. Today is so bitter sweet for me. I am so thankful for the blessing of my children. They really are my sweetest dreams come true. And I am thankful for every moment I had with my mama. She meant so much to me and a part of my heart went with her when she passed. I just can't help but wish she were here. It's hard. I've had the most tender moments today with my own sweet children, and yet there were also moments I could hardly breathe I missed mama so much.

A picture of us many years ago.
I wonder if this was taken on Mother's Day, or Easter, or if it was just some Sunday morning before church. I don't know because I can't ask her or daddy now that they're gone. This is a picture from one of the boxes that my aunt Cathy was able to salvaged when Sonny was throwing out, giving away, or selling all of my parents things. If you have no idea what I'm talking about, you can read it all here. I haven't been able to go through the two boxes of papers and pictures until just recently. I tried when aunt Cathy first sent them to me, but I had a full blown panic attack. It was bad. So, I put them to the side to look at later when I felt ready. I've been able to look through a couple of times lately, and the first time I was ok and the second time not so much. I don't want it to be so hard. I don't want to keep avoiding it, because I don't want to forget her, or daddy. Grief is a very weird process. It can make you feel crazy sometimes. I can enjoy talking about her and looking through pictures, and other times someone can talk about their own mom and I have to swallow to keep from choking on the lump in my throat. I just love her and I miss her.

She was so beautiful. This isn't me, by the way. This is her at the dance recital of one of the girls from her daycare. I love her smile in this one.

I sang in church today. I'm starting to feel more comfortable with it again. I sang A Mother's Prayer from Celine Dion's album Miracle with Anne Geddes.I love this album. It's a wonderful gift for new or expecting mothers. After church, I took the children out to eat for lunch and Trey told me he wanted to give me a gift. I told him minding his manners in church and being on his best behavior today was the best gift. He told me no he wanted to give me a gift. Anna Grace shouted, " A baby brother!" Side note: (she has decided that we are having a baby brother and has been telling people she wants one.) HA Ha ha ha! Trey said, "No sis, you can't give mama a baby brother. I'm not sure what that is all about, but I thought it was cute.

We are enjoying a very nice afternoon here at home now. I hope y'all are enjoying a beautiful day as well. Blessings from above!


Sandra said...

My heart hurts for you Tiffany and for my friend Cindy. This is her first Mother's Day without her mother. If the Lord tarries, we will all go through the grief you two have had and I dread that day.

Better watch what that little girl is praying. Children's prayers have a lot of faith behind them.:)

Love ya girl!!!

Tiffany said...

Thanks Mrs.Sandra, I needed that today. :) I received your book today. -Thank you I can't wait to read it. I remember your grandaughter praying for a baby brother or sister and now she has one, so yeah I better watch it. ha ha! :D

SharonB said...

Love you sweet friend.